If you need a good laugh read on. . . . . . . .

Have you ever spoken and wished that you could immediately take the wordsback...or that you could crawl into a hole? Here are Testimonials of afew women who did....

FIRST TESTIMONY:I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow and asked loudly, "How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blow job?" I turned around and walked back out and never went back. My husband didn'tsay a word...he knew better.

SECOND TESTIMONY:I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls. I was unhappy with the women's type I had been using. After browsing for several minutes, I was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen who work at the store. He asked if he could help me. Without thinking, Ilooked at him and said, "I think I like playing with men's balls."

THIRD TESTIMONY:My sister and I were at the mall and passed by a store th! at sold a variety of candy and nuts. As we were looking at the display case, the boy behind the counter asked if we needed any help. I replied, "No, I'm justlooking at ? your nuts." My sister started to laugh hysterically, the boygrinned, and I turned beet-red and walked away. To this day, my Sisterhas never let me forget.

FOURTH TESTIMONY:While in line at the bank one afternoon, my toddler decided to release some pent-up energy and ran amok. I was finally able to grab hold of herafter receiving looks of disgust and annoyance from other patrons. I toldher that if she did not start behaving "right now" she would be punished.To my horror, she looked me in the eye and said in a voice just asthreatening, "If you don't let me go right now, I will tell Grandma thatI saw you kissing Daddy's p ee-pee last night!" The silence was deafeningafter this enlightening exchange. Even the tellers stopped what they weredoing. I mustered up the last of my dignity and walked out of the bankwith my daughter in tow. The last thing I heard when the door closedbehind me were screams of laughter.

FIFTH TESTIMONY:?Have you ever asked your child a particular question too many times? My three-year-old son had a lot of problems with potty training and I was onhim constantly. One day we stopped at Taco Bell for a quick lunch in between errands. It was very busy, with a full dining room. While enjoying my taco, I smelled something funny, so, of course, I checked my seven-month-old daughter, and she was clean. Then, I realized that Danny had not asked to go pot-ty in a while, so I asked him if he needed to go,and he said "No". I kept thinking, "Oh Lord, that child has had an accident, and I do n't have any clothes with me." Then I said, "Danny, are you SURE you didn't have an accident?" "No," he replied! . I just KNEW that he must have had an accident, because the smell was getting worse. Soooooo, I asked one more time, "Danny, did you have an accident?" This time he jumped up, yanked down his pants, bent over and spread his cheeksand yelled, "SEE MOM, IT'S JUST FAR-TS!!" While 30 people nearly chokedto death on their tacos laughing, he calmly pulled up his pants and satdown. An old couple made me feel better by thanking me for the best laughthey'd ever had!

LAST TESTIMONY:This had most of the state of Michigan laughing for 2 days and a very embarrassed female news anchor who will, in the future, likely think before she speaks. What happens when you predict snow -- but don't get any....a true story. We had a female news anchor who, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman andasked: "So Bob, where's that 8 inches you promised me last night?" Notonly did HE have to l! eave the set, but half the crew did too they were laughing so hard!

Now, didn't that feel good? Pass it on to someone you know who needs a laugh. You are not a human being having a spiritual experience, but a spiritual being having a human experience.

I recieved this in an email this morning and laughed so hard I decided I had to share it here!!!